As I mentioned to someone on tinder the other day (what?!), I occasionally try to draw parallels between my excessive number of interests in an attempt to feel like a more coherent human being.
There’s the part of me that goes for days on end with no make up on, walking in muddy fields in floaty summer trousers and snow boots without a care in the world, feeling the perfect blend of free and indifferent (and as I mentioned to the lady in the post office as we contemplated the seasonally transcendent world outside its doors, who on earth knows how to dress for the weather at the moment?) and the part that enjoys the play and artistry of using colour, sheen & enhancement to feel a little more ‘put together’ or, ya know, somewhat goodlookin’-ish.
When I was a teenager, I blue-tacked to the top of my walls a border made from stuck-together calendar pages. I almost never use calendars in a proper way (though am best friends with my scheduling diary – retro these days to have a physical one – we are halfway through 2017 and mine is already starting to fall apart from over-use). The images were all of nature themes – an insect on a dew-dropped leaf; a precise row of perfectly curved rocks leading out to an open ocean; a field of outrageously vibrant poppies (like in this photo I took the other day while out on a modelling shoot location), or an autumnal forest with a half-glow of light, a chaos of orange, reddened and chestnut coloured leaves, a soft bed in the forest. I used to look at them, one by one, and imagine myself inside their worlds. This was pre-instagram/meme-age, but each photograph had a quote superimposed over it for a casual bit of inspiration, and my all time favourite was this one:
‘Do not follow where the path may lead, but find your own way and lead a trail’.
When I was in Indonesia for the first time nearly two years ago, a healer asked me some questions, and one of them was ‘do you consider yourself a leader?’